I Before E Except After C

Ah, the age-old conundrum of English spelling: a conundrum so befuddling that it has led many a poor soul to doubt their own intelligence, and often their very existence. Enter "i before 3 (except after c)," a title so audacious it practically dares you to question your grasp of the language. Written by the audaciously amusing Judy Parkinson, this tome from the fine folks at Michael OMara Books promises not just a guide but an experience that will leave you spellbound—or perhaps just spelled wrong.

Published in 2007, this book arrives with the weighty authority of a nearly “as new” condition—perhaps because it spent more time on a shelf contemplating its role in the literary cosmos than in the hands of a frantic reader grappling with the peculiarities of English. One might argue that the book’s very existence is the ultimate irony: a spelling guide that itself leads one to question the very nature of orthography whilst making a mockery of the rules it seeks to explain. You can almost hear the collective groan of English teachers everywhere, clutching their red pens in despair.

Now, you may wonder what insights this game-changing guide offers, lest you drift into the abyss of spelling doom. Parkinson has crafted a smorgasbord of spelling rules, quirky anecdotes, and whimsical illustrations that could make even the most begrudging of grammarians crack a smile. The book is a playful romp through the absurdities of English spelling, where ‘i’ and ‘e’ frolic in an eternal dance of confusion, and where ‘c’ lurks like a villain in a Shakespearean play, ready to ruin your day with its unexpected influence.

In the spirit of enlightening those who dare to tread the treacherous waters of written communication, the book covers an array of topics, including:

• The bewildering realm of homophones and how to not sound like a complete nincompoop.
• Phonetics: because who doesn’t want to learn about the sounds of letters in a language that makes no sense?
• Commonly misspelled words you didn’t know you were misspelling, because why not add more anxiety to your life?
• Fun and games—yes, there are puzzles! What better way to suffer through your inadequacies than with a crossword?
• Riddles that will make you question if you ever truly learned to spell correctly in the first place.

But fear not, dear reader! This book is not merely a dry collection of rules. No, it is a veritable feast for the senses, a carnival of letters that invites you to ride the rollercoaster of confusion until you finally emerge, perhaps a bit dizzy but undeniably entertained. Judy Parkinson, with her wit as sharp as a freshly sharpened pencil, takes you on a journey that makes you ponder: are spelling rules really rules, or merely guidelines that can be joyously bent, broken, or completely ignored?

Condition: The book is, as previously mentioned, in a state of ‘As New’—which is something we suppose sounds better than ‘Lightly Used by That One Relative Who Thinks They’re an Expert.’ It sits here, ready to grace your shelf or your coffee table, waiting for that moment when you’ll need to impress a guest with your knowledge of letter placement and obscure spelling exceptions. It may also serve as a conversation starter, as you regale your friends with tales of your struggle against the insidious nature of English spelling.

So, if you’re in the market for a delightful paradox wrapped in a whimsical cover, look no further. "i before 3 (except after c)" is not just a book; it’s a tribute to all the times we’ve misspelled ‘definitely’ as ‘definately’ and given up on the English language altogether. Available now at Crappy Old Books, where we celebrate the glorious imperfections of literature, one quirky title at a time.

Keep browsing: See more Humour books Other books by Judy Parkinson